What To Do When You Don’t Get The Job
Posted February 26, 2009 in Business 26 Comments »
There it was in bold print on one of my favorite blogs, the job I had applied for! The blogger had gotten MY GIG and posted about.
I had worked hard on this particular proposal. I had spent a lot of time. The client and I had been in multiple discussions about the project. They had even revealed some confidential details to me. I was absolutely certain that this job was going to be mine. Certain of it, that is, until I read that blog post!
Sooner or later, most freelancers will find themselves in this situation — losing a gig to one of their competitors. It’s something that eventually happens to almost every freelancer.
If not managed properly, losing a gig can negatively affect your morale and damage your productivity. And being envious of another freelancers (aka your competitor) can be just as bad, if not worse.
Here are some things you can do when you don’t get the job:
- Mourn your loss. Admit to yourself that you are disappointed. You may want to allow yourself a short of time to acknowledge your disappointment. If you have a good friend who is willing to listen to you vent, then that may be an option for expression. Alternatively, you may just want to take a break from work for a while.
- Move on. This is the most vital step in dealing with a lost job. Get involved in new projects. Orient yourself towards future goals and forget about past failures.
- Know that freelancing envy is a normal response. When you have worked hard to compete for a project and then someone else is awarded the work that you competed for, it is completely normal to feel a small twinge of jealousy. Don’t feel guilty on top of it.
- Compete only with yourself. You can avoid a great deal of jealousy if you compare your progress only with your own past performance rather than with the performance of others. After all, you don’t really know the other freelancers’ circumstances or even whether they are telling the truth.
Some things to avoid when dealing with a job you didn’t win:
- Don’t dwell on the loss.
- Don’t harass your competitors.
- Don’t quit applying for new projects.
When you lose out on a project, you eventually have to let it go. In most cases, the sooner that you let it go, the better. Don’t constantly think about it or beat yourself up over what you should have done differently.
Under NO circumstances should you ever leave unpleasant comments at your competitor’s blog or at the blog of the company that did not hire you. Also, avoid complaining about your competitor or the company on your own blog or in public forums, it will only make you look worse.
Sure, you’re discouraged now. That is no reason to quit trying. Keep polishing your skills and keep applying for new projects. Next time, it could be you who is awarded the work.
What are your thoughts?
What have you done in the past when you didn’t get a job you wanted? What recommendations do you have for other freelancers?
Have you ever faced freelancing envy? If so, how have you dealt with it?
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26 Comments
Angie Haggstrom
February 26th, 2009 at 5:32 pmHi Laura,
This is another one of those all important topics that I think many freelancers are afraid to bring up. I’m sure glad you did!
I honestly feel freelance jealousy is natural and can be a great learning tool. For instance, everyone has different strengths and weaknesses even if we aren’t willing to admit it. It’s part of the freelance ego perhaps.
Instead of being jealous of the winning applicant, I see it as the prime opportunity to learn from someone who obviously caught the eye of the right people. In fact, I’ll admit that I learn more by watching those who have achieved I haven’t. It’s (generally, mind you) a fantastic way to see greatness in action first hand. I pick up on what they do differently, decide if it would benefit me, and either use it or leave it.
I’m really glad to see that you mentioned not quitting on your list. I think it’s also important not to be afraid of the ‘big jobs’ either. I often find that I shy away from them for that particular reason. Silly, but I’m sure I’m not the only one who is guilty of it from time to time.
I really enjoyed the topic. Thank you!
Angie Haggstrom
Laura Spencer
February 26th, 2009 at 6:04 pmHi Angie!
I have to admit that I haven’t seen too many blog posts or read too many articles on the topic. Still, we all know that freelancing jealousy happens. Not posting about it is sort of like ignoring the elephant in the room.
I really liked your comment about learning from your competitor. I wish that I’d thought to add that point to the post.
Thanks so much for your comment and thanks for reading!
Mathew Packer
February 26th, 2009 at 6:20 pmI’ve suffered from this on more than one occasion, though lately I don’t take the knock backs as hard.
One thing that works for me is thinking about the bad points or difficulties associated with the particular job and focus on how much of a pain that would’ve been to be involved in, and then I go and educate myself on whatever that is. Basically I use the loss to motivate myself on strengthening my weakness, which usually leads to bigger, better, and higher paying jobs.
Cheers
Mat
Rebecca
February 26th, 2009 at 7:01 pmThis recently happened to me. I had a co-author on the project, and the two of us went ahead and took a few minutes to admit to each other that our feelings were hurt before we moved on with our lives. If it had been just me, I think I’d have tried to rise above it instantly, but in fact, saying “Oh, well, they just didn’t recognize our awesomeness” and laughing at ourselves made recovery much faster. So your advice, “Mourn your loss,” is excellent.
Chase Campbell
February 26th, 2009 at 8:12 pmI love the point you make about competing with yourself. I get jealous of many great designers, but that jealousy really is me just yearning to improve myself, and reach the level of success that my design heroes have.
If you continue to try and improve yourself at the skills that you want to be better at, the only place to go is up!
Laura Spencer
February 26th, 2009 at 9:14 pmI love reading the stories about positive ways that you all have dealt with not getting the job!
That’s one thing that I like about this blog community – we all learn from each other.
Chad
February 26th, 2009 at 9:24 pmAside from the double negatives (avoid not dwelling on the loss?), great article! It’s always tough to face rejection, but it’s part of the business and if you can’t deal with it, you won’t last as a freelancer.
Tracey Grady
February 27th, 2009 at 3:27 amThis is excellent advice. I spent years working in a very competitive organisation, which meant inevitably there were times when someone else was given an opportunity I had gone after. The healthiest perspective is to a) remind yourself that the successful person has good qualities too, and will bring a lot to their new position; and b) ask yourself how you can be the best candidate NEXT time.
One of the best pieces of advice I ever received was that when you are overlooked in favour of someone else, don’t be bitter, even if you think the selection was unfair to you. I think this accords with what’s been written in this post about not dwelling on the loss.
Dave Woods
February 27th, 2009 at 5:00 amGreat advice, it may not be suitable in all cases but if I’m ever overlooked or don’t hear back from a potential client then I’ll drop them a quick email just to see if they’re willing to share their reasons why they choose someone else.
I’ll make it clear that there’s no hard feelings and that if they have any projects in future that might be suitable to get in touch and I’ll be happy to give them a quote.
I find that it’s useful to find out the reasons why I didn’t get a particular project as it can help improve your proposal for future projects… and I find it’s always good to keep a relationship with a potential client and make sure that you’re approachable in future.
Steve Vyse
February 27th, 2009 at 7:41 amIf you assume you’ll win 1 in 4 pitches you’ll cope much better. No matter how well you feel the presentation and any follow ups have gone, you don’t have a gig until the client tells you. You cannot lose what you don’t have.
Try and take it in your stride and I wouldn’t recommend wallowing in grief which is a wholly negative emotion. Just pick yourself up and look to the next opportunity, but here’s a tip that has stood us well over the years. Leave your presentation alone for at least a month and then, when the emotion has gone, sit and read the brief again and compare it to your proposal. In almost every case you’ll either realise you were off direction or had left a hole for your competitors to drive through.
Eventually you’ll get better at recognising the importance of what seems to be a side-note hidden in the brief, but which is actually a deal breaker.
Creativity is fine, but don’t get carried away on a misdirected crusade from your client’s needs which are usually wholly commercial.
Laura Spencer
February 27th, 2009 at 8:37 amWow! There’s such great feedback here.
Tracy, thanks for sharing your story.
Dave – you bring up an excellent point about next time. It’s important to leave the situation on good terms so that the client thinks of you for next time.
Steve, it’s absolutely a numbers game. I hate to refer to it that way – but it’s true. A freelancer will only get a certain percentage of the jobs that he or she applies for. Great comment!
Matt Keegan
February 27th, 2009 at 10:21 amLaura, thank you for covering something we’re all too familiar with — losing gigs we think that we should get.
I’m glad that you mentioned “mourn your loss” first. Sometimes we get the wind knocked out of our sails and simply need to acknowledge what happened. Recently, a very disappointment event took place in my business life and I’m still sorting through things. We get wounded and sometimes a caring word from a friend can help us to patch up and move on.
I’ve followed you for about two years through this and other blogs so I know that what you are facing is a temporary setback. Thank you for keeping it real and, yes, you’ll snag another gig too.
Karen Swim
February 27th, 2009 at 10:29 amLaura, what a great article! I spent 20 years in Corporate Sales and then Marketing so rejection became normal for me. In Sales, I learned how to graciously lose – sending thank you notes after the loss, and doing the occasional follow up. I had a smart mentor who taught me that when you’re not number 1, work to be the best #2. Things sometimes change and when you have positioned yourself, you may still get called to get in the game.
I honestly don’t view others as competitors but colleagues. Of course I have been disappointed over losses but always believe it happened for a very good reason. I celebrate my competitors wins because I know that what happens for them can happen for me too, so it renews my hope. There are so many talented writers and marketers out there but there is room for each of us. I watch, read and learn and use their talent to fuel me to improve my own skills.
Jeff
February 27th, 2009 at 2:03 pmI will even go so far as to email the client and wish them well. If I come across a piece of data shortly thereafter that could TRULY help them I’ll forward it (but avoid sending something of little value to avoid being cloying).
So far, the net known results of these activities: 0 :( But it makes me feel like a classy, good guy.
Jeff
February 27th, 2009 at 2:03 pmI will even go so far as to email the client and wish them well. If I come across a piece of data shortly thereafter that could TRULY help them I’ll forward it (but avoid sending something of little value to avoid being cloying).
So far, the net known results of these activities: 0 :( But it makes me feel like a classy, good guy.
Johnny
February 27th, 2009 at 4:25 pmHaving one of those in-the-bag projects that ultimately gets passed on to someone else does disappoint and make you wonder where you went wrong (which is likely nothing). One way to rationalize it is that the client may just be looking for someone cheaper or they found out their long lost 2nd cousin could help them out.
Keep moving on, though. The law of averages for winning a job/project from a kick-ass proposal will eventually move in your favor.
Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach
February 27th, 2009 at 4:59 pmThe most important aspect, I believe, is:
“Mourn your loss”.
So often we’re brought up to shut out pain and grieving and losing a job – yes! That is worthy of grief!
Honor all losses, and then let them go and move ahead. But treat yourself well – you deserve the emotional catharsis.
Laura Spencer
February 27th, 2009 at 6:41 pmThanks for all the feedback! :-)
It’s good to know that so many people can relate.
Lisa Dale
February 27th, 2009 at 8:08 pmI’m new to this blog (because I’m interested in learning a bit about the world of freelance), and I thought I’d pipe in because I had a little giggle over here.
I’m in the book biz–a new novelist with Grand Central–and getting turned down is so much a part of creative writing that it’s odd not to be turned down.
The key, for me, was changing my mind about getting rejections and other writing-related disappointments. Once I stopped getting so gloomy about them and started to think of them as steps in the right direction, it really turned my whole outlook around. I feel better sometimes by simply telling myself, “Well, Lisa, that was one heck of a good try.” It’s like a consolation congratulations. And it works for me. : )
Anyway, great post, Laura. I shall continue to lurk and learn.
Catherine Cantieri, Sorted
February 27th, 2009 at 11:26 pmI have no insight to offer, just lots of appreciation for all the great comments!
Jared Walker
February 28th, 2009 at 1:52 pmA lot of my lost jobs have been because of price. The client was looking for a really cheap price and my estimate came up too high. I’ve read from other articles that a good way to avoid this problem is to offer different tiers of pricing. Offer a low estimate for certain services and a higher estimate for additional services. This way you don’t scare away some of the price-sensitive clients, and the ones that you do lose might not be worth your time anyway (so you shouldn’t feel bad about it).
On the Money
March 2nd, 2009 at 6:32 pmSounds like you were perhaps milked for ideas and then the job in reality put out to either the lowest bidder or one of their existing favourites … Frustrating if that is the case. However, you are spot on about staying positive. I had a vaguely similar circumstance and the contractor later took me on to do a job … so … !
Simon Stapleton
March 5th, 2009 at 7:25 amHey Laura – you’ve hit the nail right on the head here.
I find that the pain for freelancers is two-fold when denied a gig. One is the immediate loss of an opportunity and the income it would have provided. Enough reason to get upset. The longer term effect, which is much more devastating, is the loss of confidence that this creates. Denial after denial can really rock it.
A lack of confidence can then create some detrimental behaviors, like going in at a price that’s too low to sustain business, or bid for projects that are either not suitable, or too simple meaning that personal growth is stifled.
When I was talking to a bunch of freelancers in a recent teleseminar, most of them told me at some point that they had felt desperate and taken on projects that meant they were locked in and missed out on other opportunities. They regret not continuing pursuing the best opportunities.
It takes bravery to continue in a kind of blind-faith… but I don’t think it’s blind, it’s just the nature of the business.
Chris
March 28th, 2009 at 10:49 pmNot even getting a response is something I have had to get used to–but then again I’m learning to be pretty aggressive.
Freelance Programmer
November 1st, 2009 at 5:40 pmI am still getting used to not getting a call back. I see this a lot in programming and website development. A lot of employers I work with just don’t know what they want, and sometimes don’t realize how much quality development costs.
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